Next Summer I'll be picking out a Christmas Tree.

At first, it all started with the UBER chain stores. The holiday decorations popping up before Thanksgiving. The flyers showing up in my mailbox in time to make our Black Friday strategy a week or so in advance.

Now, I've never been one to shop too far in advance. Black Friday has always been my green light. I'd collect online discount codes, maybe pick up a rain check or two. Nothing too serious.

I was alright with the hoopla starting in early November even. But this year takes the absolute cake. I had found some really fabulous deals for back to school shopping so I made my way into a BIG chain store. I snagged what I needed and made my way to the gardening section only to find that it had already been taken over with several sizes of pre-lit Christmas trees, blue and silver dreidel decor, ornaments, and a Christmas village that would blow your mind. My bulbs and mums were smooshed into some random corner. All before school had even started.

Last week, I was again lured to the BIG store. They accept our insurance for Busy Bee's inhalers, so not really lured there so much as forced by my wallet. To make a long story short, they had started removing the Halloween stuff. Yup, you guessed it, for the Holiday stuff.

Don't get me wrong. The Holidays are my favorite time of year. My house looks like a miniature North Pole. Our tree is up the weekend following Thanksgiving. But, do we really need to extend the Holidays all the way back into August?

Am I going to have to pick out our tree in July next year, just to keep up?

Traveling & Traditions

For me, holidays are synonymous with travel. It’s not unique. It’s a common-known phenomenon—highways congested, airports overloaded.

It’s my own fault. I’m the one who left home. For school, for work, for love. Because home felt elsewhere. Or because home didn’t feel like home. At different points, different places. I guess I shouldn’t complain, I brought it on myself.

Packing up clothes and packages, newspaper clippings I’d been meaning to send to my father, gifts and toiletries, that shirt I borrowed from my sister, it’s slow-going getting ready. Slower going loading the car. But luckily for me I live where most people go. For instance, this weekend, Columbus Day weekend, most people are heading to see the foliage. We are heading south on the highway, for the most part avoiding traffic, for a quick dinner with my father, my nephew’s football game, a visit with .

We used to stay with my sister, but three now, we have overgrown our welcome. Not that she wouldn’t let us stay, we’ve done it before. Her family upstairs, ours in the basement with the air bed and the pack-n-play. Now though, with Georgia growing, the need for routine and time away from stimulation is obvious. Last night alone after a day of visiting, at dinner, she got so slap happy I knew it was only matter of time before her giggles and smiles turned south into frowns and wails. But, blaming the baby entirely would be unfair, our need for a restful night’s sleep is palpable.

So here we sit, and here I write this. From a hotel room. Our day stretching full and loaded before us. Our luggage—multiplied 175 times now with baby—strewn around us. And I wonder: Could we do this if we had another baby? We’ve already decided that Thanksgiving will be too much this year. We have opted instead, to cook our own Turkey—our first one!!—and invite family up north. Not all of them will come, stuck in their own traditions. And so we start our own…

I am beginning to understand how families break off into smaller pods. As families expand, Thanksgiving, Christmas, the Forth of July evolve. I don’t take it lightly, these are the days my child will remember. These are the bonds that will mean the most. We are a family in transition. Traveling. Trying out new traditions.

(Check out my 31 for 21 blog challenge for Down syndrome awareness at my regular blog.)

Don't forget the zesty sauce

“They f*ck you at the drive-thru.”

I can’t recall the exact line that Joe Pesci delivered in the movie Lethal Weapon while sitting in the back seat of a car, driven by Mel Gibson, which had just left the drive-thru window.

But I do recall the dozens (no, hundreds) of times that I have uttered something very similar while digging through bags of stuff, trying to find what I did order, while exiting a drive-thru.

So call me crazy, but I have a new hero of sorts in a one Christopher M. Lavigne of North Kingstown, RI.

As reported in Saturday's Providence Journal, it seems that the “zesty sauce” was missing from Mr. Lavigne’s drive-thru order at a local Burger King.

But instead of driving away and uttering something like, “They f*ck you at the drive-thru,” Mr. Lavigne parked his car. Entered the Burger King. Let loose some major “F*s” of his own at the offending employee. Kicked in the door as he exited. Broke the glass. Drove away. Got caught by a North Kingstown police officer soon thereafter.

So now Mr. Lavigne finds himself in a tad bit more trouble than missing his zesty sauce. Yes, Mr. Lavigne has been charged with vandalism and disorderly conduct.

Now don’t get me wrong. I don’t condone uncivil behavior. I have never (intentionally) broken any laws. I have certainly never been arrested. Charged. Or jailed.

But I could be.

Because I have “F*ck You'd” more Burger King, McDonald’s, Dunkin’ Donut, Starbuck’s, Taco Bell, Wendy’s… and you name it…. drive-thru employees than I dare to mention.

Because yes, I DO expect to get Jane’s Mocha Coolata with skim milk. I DO expect my husband’s DD coffee to be dark with no sugar, not light with extra freakin’ sugar. I DO expect to get Audrey’s Soft Taco with no tomatoes. I DO expect to get my grandson’s burger with NO FREAKIN’ ONIONS.

NO, I AM NOT A VIOLENT MENOPAUSAL LADY.

OK, calm down.

And although I do understand that we live in a hurried, frazzled society of get-me-this QUICK and get-me-that DOUBLEQUICK…

…if all of you fast food companies are going to OFFER fast food at the drive-thru, just PLEASE get it right. Write my order correctly. Or enter it into your computer correctly. Take two seconds to repeat my order. Let me have a moment to actually check my order (and this also involves the guy or gal behind me, up my car’s ass, honking like there’s no tomorrow).

Hey, Mr. Lavigne. I feel your pain.

But maybe we should all take pause here and reassess what we, as a frenzied society (including the improperly trained employees), bring to the burger table.

Do I need help? Or should I just park my car and head on inside?

- Sharon

The Scorecard

Holy frijole! The stars must be in alignment, because we are having the best weekend! My hubby was up in Boston for a work conference Friday afternoon and Saturday, and he managed to score tickets for Friday night's Sox game. He and our brother-in-law, who lives in NYC and was up for the weekend, went to the game and stayed all the way to the totally-not-bitter end. Go Manny!

+ 10 points for tickets! + 79 points for nice weather! + 563 points for family bonding! Winning? Priceless - woo hoo!

So, he's all happy, right? The kids and I stayed home, and played "Dance Party," and ordered pizza, and stayed up late, and just had fun. On Saturday, the kids woke me up, and I was still tired, and for the first time ever, I just blew them off! I asked them to go get their own breakfast, and they DID!

Now, imagine me fanning myself and rolling my eyes and expressing a "Have mercy" kind of vibe... I got to sleep in almost 45 minutes!

+ 1,079 points!

And then we went to a birthday party, and they were NOT the worst behaved children, and then we went up to Boston, and I dropped them off with my in-laws, and they were happy to see me go!

At least + 1,230 points, dudes!

I KNOW! It's like a parallel universe or something!

But wait! It gets better! My hubby and I met up at the hotel, and then we chilled out, and scored reservations to a terrific restaurant at the last minute, and had a great dinner and an even better desert.

At least 55 points, there. Actually, did I say 55? How about 5500, which would be approximately the number of calories we actually consumed! Whew.

And then we went back to the room, and watched a silly movie, and slept like the dead, and then we woke up and, uhm, none of your business, and then he left and met friends and tailgated and went to the Patriots game. Me? I took a cue from weeks worth of "What Not To Wear," and spent about 3 hours trying on clothes at Lord & Taylor. I was driving past, and I remembered what a nice selection of plus-sized clothing they have, and for once I didn't have anywhere else to be.

Then, I did a few more errands, like finishing almost all my Christmas shopping for the kids. I KNOW! Finally, my hubby called me and said he was almost home, and we decided to meet for an early dinner, because NO KIDS! Now we are home, watching a movie that we could never ever watch with the kids around ("Shaun of the Dead").

Current scorecard for the weekend? +17,341!

(I hope everyone else is having a great holiday weekend!)

Providence lights up

Last night my husband and I had a little date night in Providence. It's only about 10 miles from where we live, but the major highway construction going on - and the resulting traffic - can make a normally 15 minute trip to the city into an hour one (seriously, it took my mom and I an hour to get through Providence just the other day).

But I digress. Because last night the trip into Providence with my husband was actually traffic-free, and we had a wonderful dinner at our favorite Thai restaurant before taking a stroll to one of our capital city's most popular and beautiful works of art - WaterFire.

If you have never seen (or even heard of) WaterFire, this description from its website captures it perfectly:

WaterFire’s one hundred sparkling bonfires, the fragrant scent of aromatic wood smoke, the flickering firelight on the arched bridges, the silhouettes of the firetenders passing by the flames, the torch-lit vessels traveling down the river, and the enchanting music from around the world engage all the senses and emotions of those who stroll the paths of Waterplace Park.

It really is amazing to see. I only had my cell phone camera with me last night, so my photos really don't do its beauty justice.


But to be among the hundreds of thousands of fellow revelers... listening to the music, watching the children marvel at the flying embers, feeling the warmth of the bonfires, smelling the mixture of burning wood, ice cream, fudge and steak tips... it makes me love my capital city even more, and long to take in its culture more often.

- Jane